Ruined Friendships
by HermioneSnapeMalfoyWeasley
Summary: My version of the day Severus called Lily a Mudblood... Doesn't apply to OotP.


Hey everyone! This is my first fan fiction on here so please be nice? This is a Severus/Lily one shot. It's basically set on the day Severus calls Lily a Mudblood? But it doesn't apply to 'The Order of the Phoenix' version of it!

Yours till the magic ends…3

All characters belong to J.K Rowling. I am simply playing about with them…

_**Severus' POV:**_

"-Mudblood." I found the word slipping out of my mouth before I could stop it, humiliation pulsed through me. Her beautiful green eyes widened and I could see tears well up in them. Oh shit. My own eyes widened and I clamped my hands over my mouth. I could merely stutter but before I could properly say something she had turned on her heel, her red hair glowing in the light of the sun, whirling behind her and she fled. I sighed heavily. I was tempted to follow her but I decided against it. She needed space. Besides I had to deal with Potter and Black's looks. I turned to see them sneering.

"You've done it now Snivellus!" Potter's voice was thick with hatred. Black stayed silent, only his facial expression showing what he wanted to do. Kill me. After a moment of pregnant silence they turned to walk away, their shoulders sagging slightly and their hands in their pockets with the Pettigrew boy scampering after them. The only person left was Lupin for some bizarre reason.

"Got something to say too Lupin?" I snarled at him. He only looked at me with what I think was disappointment, shook his head and walked away. I heard the bell go and I quickly gathered up my books. Slytherins and Gryffindors had Potions together next. Maybe I could try and explain to Lily, we were partners after all. I walked into class to see Lily's seat next to mine was empty. I scanned the class quickly as worry overtook my senses. Worry was replaced by jealousy as I saw her sitting next to none other than Remus Lupin with Potter and Black behind them. She was smiling and laughing with them. Not just any smile, but the smile she normally saved for me. Lily must have convinced Slughorn to let her move seat. Slughorn had always emphasised the fact that he didn't have a favourite student but we all knew Lily was his favourite. Everyone loved Lily. Who wouldn't? The class started. We were supposed to make and Invigoration Draught. When we were told to go and collect our ingredients I saw Lily get up, I hurried to go after her but then she saw me and she quickly went back to her seat and whispered something to Lupin. Lupin glanced my way and got up, going to collect the ingredients instead. I sighed in defeat, I didn't manage to talk to her but I would try again later. The end of class couldn't come any slower. As soon as the bell went I rushed out hoping to catch up with Lily but I couldn't even see her. Dinner came and I quickly went down hoping to catch her before she went in. I waited at the door for a few minutes but she didn't come. I walked in and saw her sitting at the Gryffindor table, again sitting with Potter and the rest, again smiling the smile she usually saved for me. As I walked in she glanced up as if sensing my presence. We made eye contact for a split second and my breath hitched in my throat, before she got called away and the moment vanished. Dinner dragged on and my eyes rarely left her beautiful figure. Finally after what seemed like forever it was it was time to go back to our common rooms. I saw her leave and I decided to go back to the dungeons before making my way to the Gryffindor Common Room. As the clock struck ten o'clock I cast a Concealment Charm over me, slipped past Lucius and Narcissa and sneaked out the dungeons. I ascended the stairs and quickly yet quietly made my way to the portrait of the Fat Lady. Once there I waited for anyone to come out or to go in. a few minutes later a girl whom I sometimes see with Lily appeared carrying some books, she must have been returning from the library. I took of the charm and approached her.

"Hey, you. Tell Lily Evans someone is waiting for her." She simply raised her eyebrows and was about to say the password when I said something that surprised even me. "Please? It's important. I'm not leaving till she does. I'll sleep here if I have to." She sighed and nodded slightly before saying the password and climbing in through the portrait door. After a very long ten minutes the portrait hole opened again and Lily climbed out wearing a dressing gown. It took all of my strength not to smile. The image before me was priceless. Her hair was tied to the side in a messy plait, her green eyes wide and filled with fire and her arms folded over the dressing gown which was tied tight around her small body. A few seconds of silence passed before I opened my mouth to say what I had wanted to say all day. Two simple words. "I'm sorry" my voice was a mere whisper and my eyes full of regret. (A/N: The conversation that follows is the work of J.K Rowling from Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Chapter 33, The Prince's Tale. No copyright intended)

"I'm not interested." Her one was dry and cold. This was my fault.

"I'm sorry!" I said a little more forcefully, my voice a little louder.

"Save your breath," her voice stayed the same. No emotion. Nothing. "I only came out because Mary told me you were threatening to sleep here." Why… Did she care if I did?

"I was. I would have done. I never meant to call you Mudblood it just-" She interrupted me.

"-slipped out?" Her voice now held one emotion. One Potter had in his voice a few hours ago. Hatred. "It's too late, I've made excuses for you for years. None of my friends can understand why I even talk to you. You and your precious little Death Eater friends" My throat had gone dry. I was speechless. "You see? You don't even deny it! You don't even deny that's what you're all aiming to be! You can't wait to join You-Know-Who, can you?" I opened my mouth to say, 'I have no choice! They expect me to become one because I'm Slytherin!' but again my voice failed me. She continued.

"I can't pretend any more. You've chosen your way, I've chosen mine." That hit me like a rock. I had ruined everything. I tried one last time.

"No-listen I didn't mean-" My voice turned desperate but again she interrupted me.

"-to call me Mudblood? But you call every one of my birth Mudblood, Severus. Why should I be any different?" Her tone was now soft and questioning. A million answers to this question invaded my brain.

'Because you're the reason I live. Because you mean everything to me. Because… I love you.' Yet I didn't say any of them. Lily just gave me a look of sadness and climbed back into Gryffindor Tower. The portrait door swung close with a dull thud. I closed my eyes and whispered quietly into nothing,

"I love you, Lily. I'm sorry." I put the charm back on and turned to go back to the Slytherin Dungeons with the thought that those beautiful green eyes would haunt me till my dying day…

_**Lily's POV:**_

I closed the portrait door behind me and it landed in its place with a dull thud. I heard a soft whisper outside but I couldn't make out the words. My eyes filled with tears but I blinked them away furiously.

"I love you, Severus. I'm sorry." I whispered quietly into nothing. I turned to go back up to the girl's dormitory with the thought that those dark black eyes would haunt me till my dying day…


End file.
